See Ya
Im Movin' on out
We are in the process of moving so I haven't had much time to blog. I will say this, moving sucks ass. This will be the last move for us for a long time. I have been spending time on kaboodle.com, its really a cool place for all those fashionistas and design geeks out there. Anyway we are getting settled at my mothers now so I will be blogging again soon.
These are a few of my Favorite Things
THESE ARE A FEW OF MY FAVORITE THINGS (The "real" list)
My family and the way they bring out the best in me
My husbands kind eyes, his goofy laugh, his amazing calm when I am in psyco mode, and when he leans over to kiss me and say I love u in the middle of the night
My little daughters dimples, her independent spirit , how in love with her daddy she is, and how she tilts her head to the side and bats her eyelashes to get her way
My older daughters carefree dancing, her sensitivity, her curiosity, her optimism in any situation and the fact that she is only 7 and she is one of my best friends
The stretch on my stomach (it reminds me that I am a mommy)
my wedding band
when my mother in law rolls around on the floor playing with my kids every time she comes by
my mothers nicknames for my kids Dimp and Smooches
My father in law, love him!
My friendship with my best friend, no matter how long its been since we have spoken we always seem to pick up right where we left off
Ellen Degeneres, (seriously )she is such am inspiration to me, she is my Oprah!
Dr. Wayne Dyer (if u don't know, u better go find out, he will change your life)
THESE ARE A FEW OF MY FAVORITE THINGS (The Superficial List)
(in no particular order, but shoes is first)
Shoes (especially wedges and flip flops)
Shopping
Boston and all its sports teams (SOX, PATS, CELTS and the Bruins I Suppose)
Movies (The color purple, the 40 year old virgin, Friday, steel magnolias,Boyz in the hood, The kings of comedy)
Music (Wu Tang Clan, Jay Z, NERD, NAS, Fall Out Boy, Gym Class Heroes, Linkin Park)
SEX
Jewelry
furniture (ikea, pottery barn, ethan allen, west elm)
Dane Cook (SU-FI)
Katt Williams
Cedric The entertainer
Wanda Sykes
I love Love LOVE Ellen Degeneres
sleazy reality shows
cupcakes (baking them more than eating them)
the Wii
wide legged pants (they work wonders on fat chicks)
My Mac
Crocheting
Reading (magazines and books)
deodorant (buying and applying, don't ask)
hair products
lip gloss
pizza. seafood, banana chips
Shoes, in case u missed that
Baby, Baby, Baby
Even though we are in the midst of a move, my husband and I have been trying to get pregnant. I know that sounds crazy, but with my history it will probably take forever for it to happen and if it happens sooner that later at least nine months from now we will be back in North Carolina by the time that the baby is born.
After I had my last child, I didn't really want to have another one. My recovery from it was really difficult, I got really sick and I couldn't even hold her for the fist week she was at home.
I have something called Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome or PCOS. Its fairly common. The symptoms are weight gain (check) Irregular periods and in turn not ovulating(check) high blood pressure (check) Diabetes (not yet, but I do show signs of insulin resistance) and an increase of male hormones (I do have some facial hair that I do remove, but I haven't sprouted balls yet!) among several other symptoms. No fun in other words.
I think that the one thing that bothers me the most is that I have so many problems with fertility. I was on meds to conceive my second child and it cause mood swings and I was so depressed that it had to come to that to have a baby. I really want to try for a boy, but I am not really looking forward to all that it take to get there. I just wish that it would happen the old fashion way like with my first.
This last two months I actually got my period and I tracked the days that I should have been ovulating, and we well you know and I am hoping that it worked. If not it was fun trying! As of right now I my period is 6 days late, I took a pregnancy test on Friday and it was negative, but I read that women with PCOS sometimes won't get a positive test result for a while because the hormone levels are so low. So I am hoping that I am pregnant now.
Go Celtics! BEAT LA
Congrats Celtics on the Win last night, keep up the good work, you deserve the title!
I am done being scared!
Hubby and I had a free afternoon to ourselves yesterday so we decided to catch a movie, something we don't get to do that often. We were going to see Indiana Jones, but everyone we know said that it was kinda disappointing. My husband wasn't into SATC and I hate Adam Sandler. So we saw the Strangers. The ads for it made it look good and scary and the movie didn't disappoint. I was under my husbands arm the entire movie. Toward the ending it got slow, but the end made up for it. In one word the moving was disturbing. In the beginning it says that its based on real events and I think that is what made it so crazy. When we got home my husband looked it up to see how real it was and found out that a lot of the plot was real, but that some of the elements were derived from the directors childhood experiences. What was the most disturbing is that the real crime was was more grizzly and it involved children I am glad that the movie didn't go there because that is a deal breaker of me, I can't watch movies where children are hurt. Needless to say I was scared all night!
That got me to thinking, as I have gotten older I realized that there are several things that we do as teenagers and young adults that we just don't deal with as we get older. For instance, for years I was always so amped to go to amusement parks and ride the roller coasters and I loved it. But when I was about 25 I went to six flags and rode the Superman ride and before it took off, I wondered why I was even on this damed thing. I realized then that I didn't really like roller coasters and I never really did. All I do is close my eyes and scream and I didn't every really enjoy them. So I haven't gone on one since and I will probably never ride one again. That is the same way that I feel about scary movies, I am done with them. I get too scared to even enjoy them.
So I am done being scared.....at least of horror flicks and roller coasters. Now I just have to stop being afraid of everything else!
Congrats OBAMA!!!!
I am so terribly excited about this presidential race. I am so confident that Barak Obama is the right man for the job and I think that he has what it takes to turn this country around. My favorite tee shirt says it all. 
MTV RealiTV Tila Tequia and Real World...Bonus Johnny Depp
A shot at love
I feel like I need to cleanse my eyes after watching this show. She made out with 5 people this episode all in one day. Far be it for me to sound like a prude, I had my fair share of fun, probably too much, back in the day. But this is just icky.
Jay says the Bo got his sloppy seconds, but according to my tally he got someone else sloppy thirds!
So on this episode they were give the option of getting a Tila themed tattoo, a piercing, walking on (fake) glass or sitting in the electric chair. Um, what, I mean she is cute, but not pain worthy! So there ended up being three tattoos, one piercing, a glass walk and one in the chair. Then they ad to drink hot dogs as a competition cause thats a true measure of love, and Lisa won again. It all seemed kinda lame to me in the end.
Tonight she sent Lisa and George home, so my prediction was wrong. I think that Brittany should have gone home, she is kind of a brat. According to the preview the final two looks like Bo and Christy and I read that she picks Christy in the end. Next weeks episode the finale should be interesting, Tila meets the parents.
I just re-watched the MTV movie awards overall it was corny with the exception of the skits with Mike Myers, the fatty smoking Seth Rogan and then there was Johnny Depp. Be still my heart....he looked so hot, just ridiculously hot. He took it back to the 21 jump street/cry baby days with the clean shaven face. He no longer looked like a 19th century french peasant. My husband, soooo jealous!
Real World
The episode this week was good. Joey came back, but its clear that he is not going to be able to handle the life back in the real world house. Rehab seems like it has helped him a lot and I think that with him being back in the house will make him relapse. Joey was angry that his housemates were not being sensitive to the fact that he was now sober because they were drinking and partying just as much as they were before he left for rehab. I do think that it was a little shady that there were drinking right in front of him, but Bri was right when she said that they shouldn't have made any promises about changing when he got home because they wouldn't keep, and in that house its every man for themselves. Joey really needs to do what is best for himself and that probably means going back home.
For some reason I think that Sarah is pregnant, call me crazy because I thought that she was celibate or waiting till she was married. I am probably wrong, but she hasn't been partying with the rest of them lately and this was before Joey came home.
How much of a tool is Greg! And who in the hell told him that he was good looking enough to be a model. I don't think that he is ugly, but as soon as he opens his mouth, busted! I am glad that he is gone, I am not sure why he thought that the rules didn't apply to him when it came to the job, but from his personality it seems he is not too much of a rule follower.
Ok, I hate to do this to my girl Bri, but from one sista to another, I am sure that your extensions looked bangin when you first got them done, but now they have worn out their welcome. I like the hair color on her, but she needs to do something else to it or at least have it re-braided.
I think that Will is such a cutie, he looks so much better with the dreads off his face. And I think that him and Janelle make a really cute couple, but she seems like a little of a heartbreaker.
That's just my baby's daddy
I hate the fact that there are so may if's and whens with this move I hate even more that I am putting my kids through all this transitioning. The baby is ok, but I worry about my older daughter. She has been through so much in her short life, and more, her biological dad (bio) who had been locked up for a year just recently got out of jail and after not seeing her for more than a year is making a half assed attempt to be in her life. A closer relationship between them was part of the reason why we moved back.
When he and I broke up when she was a baby, I think that he resented me and took that out on her. Then when I met my husband and he embraced her as his own, her bio started vieing (sp?) for more of her time, but unfortunately he doesn't know how to be a father and what to do with a child outside of taking her to Chuck E Cheese and the mall. And his mother doesn't like me, so I think she takes that out on her, she claims that there is a language barrier (i'm black and they are spanish, I don't think that she likes me because I am black) but she speaks enough english to carry on a simple conversation and I understand enough spanish to do the same. So she never calls my daughter so there is no communication from her unless its through her bio. They are missing out on how much of an amazing kid she is and i think that she is a poor excuse for a grandmother. My husbands mother on the other hand has been amazing to her. She tells people that no matter how many grandchildren she has my daughter will always be her favorite. It makes me proud to know that someone feels that way about my child.
Her bio is such a loser, when I spoke to him yesterday he was complaining that it was so hard for him to find a job, well asshole you got locked up for doing something stupid so guess whose fault it was? One thing I can say is that he has the utmost respect for my husband, as he should, because he has been there for my daughter since she was a year old. When she talks about her daddy, he is who she is talking about. He wishes that he could adopt her, but we both know that her father wouldn't allow it. I would never keep her from him if we did go through with the adoption, because I think that she has every right to know who her real father is. But my husband is who takes care of her and is there for her and I know that it the way its going to be for the rest of her life.
I try to remain neutral in front of her because I don't want her to resent me for bad-mouthing her bio all her life on the flip side I won't make any excuses for him either. Right now she doesn't question why he doesn't come to visit her or why he only call once in a while or where he was for a year, but one day she will and he will have a lot of explaining to do to her. As much as I want to save her from being hurt by him I know that I can't, thats why I wish that if he won't step up and be the father she needs he won't stand in the way and let my husband be the father to her that he can't be.
That's why I don't understand how fathers can just not be in their kids lives, they are an extension and a reflection of us, how could you not want to be there and if you are there how could now be an active parent. Like my dad, he was around, but it always seemed like he was too busy for me. I think some of that stems for the lack of a father figure in his childhood, but somewhere the cycle needs to end and I am glad that I am working on ending it with me.
Well we're movin on up
I haven't had much time to blog lately, we are in the process of moving out of our apartment. I hate this apartment, its so loud outside and out neighbors across the hall cook with so much curry and garlic I feel like I am in India.
My husband and i are both form Mass, but four years ago after we were married we moved to North Carolina, we were happy there, but when we had our daughter we kinda got home sick so we moved back home last summer. We had a lovely three bedroom house and a huge yard and we left it all to come back here. The house actually belongs to my mother, she bought it when we originally decided to move to NC and when we left last summer she rented it to a deadbeat who is barely paying the rent.
Around the first of the year we decided that we were going to move again, out apartment is too small and too expensive for a family of four. Anyone that knows this area knows how expensive it is, especially for a family just starting out. We looked in Rhode Island, which isn't much better and then in Connecticut, but we don't know anyone there. The answer was staring us in the face, move back to NC.
Well my mother was happy, because she didn't have to worry about paying the mortgage on the house she was renting and when she retires next year she is moving to NC. But we weren't sure how my husbands family would react, they were so supportive with us moving back, we knew it break their hearts to see us go bask to NC.
We were pleasantly surprised when they were very understanding about us moving again. They could see how we were struggling here. Now the daunting part for us is actually getting all of our shit down there again. I swear this is the last time in a long time that we will move again. I only moved once as a child and my husband had never moved, but by now we are pros!
Right now our plan is to move all our stuff to NC in three weeks when out lease is almost done and we are still waiting for my husband to get a transfer so we will wait here until that happens and we will stay with my mother. Since my eldest daughter has to start school down there in August we are kinda hoping to move soon, as of August 1 the house is ours again.
So we are waiting to hear about the transfer, I am getting nervous because its been a month, the position that he applied for is pretty much a lateral transfer, so it should go smoothly, if it would actually go! Now I have been looking for a job so we can just go.
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